blur blah...

the super bowl is coming up and im nursing a cold. its proven rather hard today to be either comfortable or asleep. i laid in bed watching my feet twitch under the sea of blankets for at least an hour before i decided to get up and try to face the day. so hear i am dear readers keeping company with a box of tissues and some earl grey and thankfully a clean house marathon.

i did manage to finish "the wild things" by dave eggers and "the austere academy" by lemony snicket today. the good thing about days off is that i get to spend them with my books. the bad thing about days off is there is so much stuff i need to get done but i never get to it. and today i have no plan to.

ive been pulling for the saints since i gave up on the bears this year. and i stay true to my word that i really think it is the saints years to take it. im hoping for a great game. its been awhile since ive been able to really get behind a team. but thankfully baseball season is on its way.

and on that not ladies and gents im going to go nyquil myself and dream about teams that can finish out a season.

some people ruin their lives to get in that book...

tonight we watched King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters oddly enough not quarters were involved but there was one major gigantic douche bag. the game follows the stories of billy mitchell and steve wiebe (wee-bee) in their competition to have the highest Donkey Kong score. for those of you who dont know billy mitchell had held the record for 25 years. pretty much from the beginning of the movie you realize what an asshole this guy its. whether its his inability to show up to play live, his crappy home taping of his high scores or the fact that he keeps plugging his wing sauce and restaurants every five minutes. the highlight of the film is when he explains that "anyone would know what his 3 letter gaming initials were if they just looked at him" the cameraman guessed tie...apparently its usa. because he only wears american ties. lets just let that soak in.

on the other hand we have the slow climbing hero steve wiebe who much like the cubbies i feel myself pulling for regardless of the odds. they discount his first video and put this incredible pressure on him to preform. mitchells groupies (and possible lovers, im just saying) harass and pester steve everywhere he goes. but billy is nowhere to be found. eventually steve is accepted in the gaming community and even beats billys high score. you walk away feeling like you really can do anything if you just believe.

my all time favorite quote from the movie is when steves family is on their way to the guinness book of world records competition and steves daughter says " some people ruin their lives to get in that book."

so wise. so here we are with the underdog on top. victory at our fingertips. and yes im going to misconstrue this moment for my own gain, lets go cubs. for the love of god let this be our year.

my boyfriend has fallen asleep on the couch next to me while watching some strange godzilla versus giant mutant space crab movie. unfortunately since this is on public access there is no way for me to find the title. but when i searched godzilla versus giant mutant space crab there this wonderful picture from the film came up. the man human character seems to be a young asian boy in very short shorts and a yellow baseball hat. i wasnt aware the movie was even on until i heard what appears to be a tiny baby godzilla proclaim "i have to fight or godzilla will think im a wimp".....aint that the truth ruth.

im too tired to type...

i woke up this morning feeling like i was on top of the world. im not sure if it was because it was the first night i had slept without a horrible dream or if it was because i knew that before the end of the day i would have a sweet sweet sangria in my hand. either way the sun was shining through the bitter cold and i felt fine.

i had dinner with three lovely ladies tonight and we managed to take up a table for over four hours while comparing work horror stories. just so you people know those of us who work at the library get together and talk about you. about the crazy clothes you wear or what you say to yourself out loud for all of us to hear. its no different from any other customer service job in that we need you to keep our doors open, but we despise you none the less.

JD Salinger passed away today. for those of you who dont know who he was or had no idea he was still alive, shame, shame on you. for those of you who dont care pick up a book of his.

but please for gods sake leave your tail and bells at home.

legion legion legion...boo.

the last few nights have been riddled with nightmares and the early signs of insomnia creeping back in. i woke up this morning around 5 sobbing hysterically and sitting straight up. i will not go into the details of the dream because they actually disturb me enough to not want to recount, but for some reason its dreams like that that put certain doubts and wandering thoughts in my life into perspective. so i snuggled close to craig and tried to drift back off to sleep.

we saw legion the other day. those of you who have not seen it and want to skip this paragraph, i will ruin it for you. i went into this movie expecting to be scared and that there was some sort of demonic aspect. for those of you who dont know legion is the name of a demon in the bible um lets see i think its mark 5:9..and jesus asked what is your name and he answered my name is legion for we are many. yeah creepy from the get go. also let me preface this summary with the fact that i am not a fan of movies that take place in just one place. i get bored. the movie starts with a stereotypical trailer trash girl talking about how her mom use to tell her to believe in god because he is gracious and kind. but after a divorce moms view changed to the wrathful angry god who would one day bring judgement and the apocalypse. when charlie (our heroine) asks her mother why god has changed his mind she gives the ever so comforting motherly advice "maybe god just got tired of the bullshit." we flash forward to a desert diner where our dear charlie is not only very pregnant but also sporting a very healthy smoking habit. low birth weight what?!!? and there is a boy whose name i honestly can not remember (thats a great sign for a main character) who is in unrequited love with our dear charlie. the dinner houses BOY's father, a short cook who is also a christian, a war vet and has a claw for a hand, an upper class family made up of a hip father pretentious mother and slutatstic daughter, who's BMW broke down during their drive across the desert. then drives in tyrese, whos character i really cant figure out. hes obviously driving somewhere with a gun and doesnt want to be involved with the police. you put the pieces together. we jump back to LA where a man has just fallen from the sky, he then cuts off his wings in an alley and steals a bunch of heavy duty guns from a toy store warehouse (oh LA so full of dreams and angels) we learn later that this now man is indeed Micheal the archangel. disaster starts to take over the major cities as we find ourselves back at the diner where a little old lady has joined us for dinner. after insulting everyone she switches into demon mode crawls on the ceiling and bites a good chunk out of hip dads neck before being shot by tyrese. Michael shows up shortly after trying to remain as mysterious as possible and slowly begins to unravel what is really going on. at which time we get to take a glimpse into heaven where Michael and gabriel are having a conversation about what god has ordered them to do. apparently it is not demons but angels that are possessing these people. god is wiping out humanity because he has gotten sick of our bullshit. but charlies baby could save us all. god orders that the baby not be born. michael doubts this mission and expresses this to his bff gabriel. we are left with the haunting line "are you going to give your father what he asks for? or what he need?" this is Michael's motivation to actually save humanity and restore gods faith in us. so angel possessed people start to attack the dinner in large groups. they are tricky, playing to characters weaknesses and using small children to carry out horrible tasks. eventually we lose hip dad, tyrese and slutastic daughter. but all the characters were so under developed that i didnt seem to mind that they were gone. gabriel then hits the scene to fight with Michael as charlie new baby and BOYa drive off to a refuge set up by other survivors. before they leave Michael tells BOYa to "find the prophets and learn to read the signs". Michael and gabriel fight to the death at which point gabriel slaughters Michael and he disappears. we jump to BOYa and charlie driving to safety when gabriel catches up with them. so they climb up a hill (which is of course what you do when a flying messenger of the almighty is after you) just when we think that BOYa is going to die, Michael returns from heaven to let gabriel know that he has failed god and that god is pleased with man and Michael once again. he spares gabriels life and calls him a failure. the movie ends with BOYa and charlie driving with the same opening playing over we see they have the baby and shit ton of guns.

so this is what i learned from this movie :god will one day get tired of our bullshit and kill us off horrifically. even if you are super close to god (like gabriel) and do exactly what he tells you, you will fail him and he will punish you. but if you do what you think is best and dont worry about what god says (Michael) you will be rewarded and epically win. also dont get pregnant, problem solved.

...a duller spectacle this earth of ours has not to show than a rainy sunday...- thomas de quincey

my favorite thing about sunday mornings is reruns. there are so many shows that i dont catch during the week due to work or video games being played. i dont sleep in any later on sundays than i do the rest of the week and when the tv is working i get to catch up on project runway and whatever horrible television i missed out on this week.

sundays for quite a long time have been my least favorite day of the week. i am often heard repeating that "sundays are worthless". and logistically they are. nothing gets accomplished. i have no motivation to do anything. i no longer go to church nor support any major religion so sunday doesnt hold any holy moment value. football season has long been over in my heart due to me being a bears fan. but that dears is a different story.

i havent spent much time with craig lately and i feel like there is this weirdness between us. i spent two nights out and then he was out for most of last night. now im not one of those girls that demands all of her boyfriends time. i dont need the constant reassurance that he loves me. i know he does. i just feel like we havent communicated lately and its weird. hes really become one of my best friends and im bummed when we dont get to hang out. ha. enough sappy stuff for now. i also spent all of my alone time last night watching an svu marathon and the jersey shore reunion so i think my mind is in a weird place.

i have no clue what today will bring.

i never get enough...

i am always so unable to fall asleep. like get in to bed and go to sleep. if i fall asleep on the couch first im golden. i am ever so tired. my eyes are burning from a mix of abrasive light and chemical fumes from hair day but they wont stay closed long enough for me to slip slide away into dream land. im not sure if its because i spent so much time not sleeping in beds that my body doesnt recognize it as the place it is suppose to fall asleep. i guarantee if you put me at a work desk or behind the wheel of car...POW! id be out like a light. but instead here i am typing away on the couch hoping that the chore of focusing words into sentences will lull myself into sleep.

as of now its not working.

i spent all of my day at work and all of my night with sarah. and my debit card came today. awesome because now i can stop writing checks, sucktacular because we went to ulta.

im too grumpy to do this.

sleep damnit.